This blog is just meant for one....... The only one...... :)
I asked Your permission... Hope you like it :)
I've been wanting to write out whatever I thought about you for a very long time... Afraid how you may react to it, I postponed it... But now... I'm convinced that you wouldn't take it so bad... :)
So, Right now You Must be thinking who is she talking about... In fact, thats what I am Thinking... What is Our relation.... Are We friends? If so, Then Why Am i not writing about the rest of my friends ( ok... I agree i don have many).... A Sibiling??? nahhhh... Never... I never had that idea When I talked to you.... A Classmate...lol... All we did when we were in class is criticize each other... Thats not classmate!!! An Enemy... Yea mebbe... My best friend smiley would love to say... Enemy... Dear Enemy... Like People Sometimes Use the term 'Sweet Idiot' :D well.... I Remember Someone telling me That All Relations Don't Have Names... May be its one such...... A Companion, A Friend, A Relation, A Listener........ Whatever :DAll In One And Just One for All Relations.......... :) :)
Soo... I guess You got a clean idea of whom I'm Talking about.... :P Its sometimes strange you know... You know someone for ages.... And never cared about him/her... And suddenly they seem so important... that the rest of the world seems practically non-existing!!! As I Read in a novel....
"I LOOKED AT HER... SHE WAS BRUSHING A HAIR FROM HER FORE-HEAD... AS SHE USUALLY DOES... SUDDENLY I HAD AN URGE TO TELL HER THAT I LIKED HER... SUDDENLY SHE SEEMED TO BE THE MOST CUTEST WOMEN ON EARTH.... SUDDENLY, AS IF, AS IF, A LIGHT HAD BEEN THROWN ON HER IMAGE IN MY MIND................................ "
You never know what happens the next moment in your life... trust me.... I had known you for ages I guess... You know the fact... We hated each other... Or atleast I did... (I know m gona get one from you for this...lol anyways!) I hated you... not because I was against you... Or that you were that bad... But coz U got soo much Hype that irritated me.... lolzzzzz... :D
As time went on many of my best friends, went on completely agreeing your views, appreciating your works.... I must tell you... I was possessive about my friends... Sort of Added Fuel To The fire.... I begin to hate you even more for stealing them....
IT IS QUITE STRANGE YOU KNOW... THAT MY HATRED WAS COMPLETELY IN CONTROL AND I NEVER DID AVOID YOU.... THATS STRANGE.... :O :O
It so happened as time passed by... I realized my friends were true.... But by the time... Our ways changed....
Must I mention in here.... I don't know... :D But yeah it is true... I had been suffering from pangs of guilt... Guilt that I misunderstood You... Unnecessarily.... Many @ times.. I probably just over-reacted... :( Talking to you those days I completely understood that You had no idea... what my first impression about You was... It is even more strange that I was secretly worried, If You came to know about all this... What exactly You would Think about me..... I had no idea... But I was sure of one thing- that You ought to know... I'm not the sort to move around feeling guilty... :) And I'm happy that You Took it Jovially... Anyways It isnt as if You were giving me A Nobel price Or A miss- perfect-goody-goody-girl award... You would've even scolded me....... :D i knowww... :) :)
So then... I entered hostel life... perfectly @ peace(atleast when i went) lolzz... Like some people believe that open mind is good for accepting anything... Note carefully : I said "SOME PEOPLE BELIEVE" :D Well as You Say It is better we live our lives the way we want to.... As long As we dont disturb others... :)
Times became very tough.... The picture which I thought About my life was shattered... Shattered.. Shunned By people Whom I thought would adore me... Busy Lives.. Busy people... And me Doomed In Loneliness.... :'( even today When I read Those Initial Catastrophes.. Trust Me My Eyes Get filled With Tears... Both Of Gratitude And Pain..... Only You Knew The True Story... And You Weren't Enjoying Either... Though You Tried To Convince People.. You Let Me View The True Image......... :)
FOR THOSE TIMES,THANK YOU...... :)
It all begun as casual conversations.... You begun them... By appreciating things which I never knew I was good at... Anyways It was obvious... :) Wasn't it...??? It begun describing the whole day... The Problems... Endless... Waiting for the hols to come... Insight into The past... Cherishable moments... Fleeting memories.. Few Fights... Long Conversations... Endless Reassurances... Concern.. Appreciation... And Now I have only One word to add to this.. GRATITUDE...... :)
I still remember every word You spoke... Continuously Telling me that it is better to just read people and Move ahead... Not to Even give A thought Why they are that way... Coz everyone aint perfect.... Like the way we are..... :P
And The Title..... "MISS.RESPONSIBLE HEAD..." The responsibility... which I used to hate... Being the eldest... Became My pleasure.... :) Appreciation... The Magic Of Words... Which Makes Peoples attitude change... I used To think... :)
Concern... Thats what... When I fainted Once... Out Of hunger... :| Concern... Concern... I knew the definition Then.... I knew It then... And The Way You reacted... Is Still In My Mind... Every Word of it......
And Of course... Endless, Pointless, Useless Conversations... Which Still Is My Favorite Part... Still lingers in my memory..... Stupid plans... silly nicknames.... And Your Information about movies... And My information about Books.... :D both added the sugar-and-spice to the conversation... :) Niceee... :)
Your Endless Useless Attempts To Make Me feel Jealous(remember its not dat easy :D) Chechi :P Now You must be remembering!!!!
When I was sure I couldn't Do anything... The time This year when I had to support dad For the first time... I was sure that I wasn't strong enough for that... I needed support.... Thank You For standing By My side those times.. :)
Then.... Then... So on and on... Your Anger!!!!!! I forgot to add a note about that... A small mess... In The Long journey... Remember For that simple thing... Only I know How Difficult It was for me To cope up those two days.... :'( And then the misunderstanding cleared.... I cried The first(and hopefully last) Time coz of You.... :) And Then The Request And Promise... A Good Memory,right????
Then Another Wave Of Indifference... Back home... A Way too busy life for which I hated Many of my friends... And How much I had to Take it... :( Then I completely And very frankly said how Much It hurt mee.... And I was In fact Astonished To Note that You understood... (I really was convinced That You would never get my point for all the gold in arabia!!) But You Proved Me wrong.... Once again!!!!! During the Solar Eclipse... That was the Best day I Had In My Life... It Wasn't a great deal either... But, You know, It is just small acts that make people happy... Ecstatic... Atleast It made me feel soo.... :D
Whats the word they use... TRUST.... Every time to think about it now... Only I said "don't say this to anyone..." You never said that to me... of course, except that life time plan :) Don't worry... I haven't said it to A soul... So That was what Trust meant.... I knew then.....
So.... Its Long aint It?????? Can go on describing...I guess:D But I'll Wind it up right here....
THANK YOU.....................
You May Read This And Say "WHAT?" lol Like the way You Imitate me Over the phone! :) ^-^
Words can Never say How Much I owe You.........
THANK YOU...................................................................!
P:S-Hope you Liked it ^-^
:) :)
6 comments:
luvly.. didnt know u write this well.. :)
thank you bro.... :)
SUPERB blog but takes time to read
awesome... :)
thanks de ^-^
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