All that you wanted to know

It Is All I Ever Wanted To Say.... :)

Have your ever had a dream like a dream that you would do anything to see it for real, a dream that is like only yours, a dream too good to be true? Engineering was mine <3 span="">
September 13TH 2009 will always be a very memorable day for me. My first surprise birthday party at home. My school friends had organized it, it was kind of a fare-well, since I was starting the same day night to my college at Tiruchirappalli, a place I had gone once or twice as a kid, 300 km from home.
‘She was so good at studies, she got a fine enough score, that is good for a studious person, but not good enough to be a topper. 190 was my cut off on a scale of 200. 10 marks lost, life ended. I never thought so though, I wonder why. I was always propelled ahead by my passion, rather than driven by the fear to fail. She could get a good private Engineering college, or parents are rich- they could pay for a medical seat too.’
Medicine, I will tell you today why I never went for it! Doctors are probably the people I consider next to God, I respect the profession so much that I would never consider myself fit enough to be one. I had once witnessed them at work, when my father got heart attack. I felt that is something, I should admire from a distance. To be frank I would do true justice even if I did it and I was capable enough and meticulous at work too, somehow My respect for the profession also became a reason for me to stay away from it!
I wonder why people attributed the loss of 10 marks to my mother’s new Tata sky connection at home. I, even today am not TV addict, Funny actually!
Then came the options- my mother, the poor lady till today has been trying hard to me a perfect girl, in the sense make me stay close to her, adorn in beauty, see me grow up and stuff. I know mom you would have imagined me travelling in all those hi-tech buses at the start of the day, with a big grin and waving you good bye. I am sorry I never gave you the chance to pack my lunch box, both at school and college. I am sorry to have moved away for a span of four years and Again I am moving away, I am sorry.
Sigh! So much to pen down actually, m being washed in a whirlpool of emotions. I do know millions of people are passing out as Engineers along with me, millions have done and millions are on the road to do the same. But I am selfish, I am going to tell you all that I so badly wanted to say all these days. Cuz my UG journey is over. Over.
Then came the department in Engineering. I was never good at electricals, not even putting battery in my remotes :P Dad was a genius at it, seriously in his work, he drew respect of mine. I still remember when I was in 4th – 5th he used to sit with his big board charting out the stuff for his Ph.D thesis report. He hated getting disturbed at work and mom used to warn me and bro to stay away from him. But I silently would pull up my homework note and silently sit by his side and write something. To which, he would look up and smile. People are asking me today why it is a big day? You have no idea how happy I feel holding a copy of my thesis. Yes, I have grown up!
Now that electrical was ruled out of the place, mechanical drew my attention on the large. To an extent, that was what you would expect someone to like. I had spent all my kindergarten holidays at the workshop of H.I.E.T college, playing with screws and nuts, my grandpa being a mechie himself. Used to sit and listen to whatever he taught to them, go around doing vroom vroom :P And Barbie dolls? Nope! Never!
You can’t take away the passion, can you? In blood is always a part of yours. Even though you forget it, it never forgets you!
Automobile- the decision I had finally zoomed into. The options I had for college –the prestigious MIT at Chennai, a college that decided to kick me out based on merit, PSG tech a college my dad had denied, since it was autonomous and finally AUT- a college that I never ever in my wildest dreams thought I would join. It was never my option list! I was open to anything staying at home or far away, but somehow I felt Chennai culture was going to distract me from work. AUT seemed to have all that I needed then- a govt college, a good dept and away from home.
Nevertheless, it was a bomb shell to my mom she still feels I should have stayed at Chennai. But then I respect you for respecting my decision J
Four years ago, on September 14TH I left my hometown Chennai out on a completely new venture called ‘Engineering’ to a place called Trichy. Dad had set out to drop me at hostel. The day I still remember, we sat in inauguration ceremony. I was good at speaking English even at school, I asked some doubt to a NSS senior that day, the way he stammered to give a proper reply I was shell shocked.
That was just the start, the first 15-20 days I was stepping out of my shell, my mindset. I could see people who were far below my expectation levels at hostel. Their hygiene, food, thoughts and vocab was, to be frank, pathetic! I judge people a lot, I even now do. I believe to judge them by work, so I decided to give them another shot. I was wondering why even people would be interested in wedding after engineering, I was wondering why it was necessary to difference between mascara and kajal (I donot know if both are same, I am noob at all this :P)
Even these to an extent, dad had warned me and I was aware of. What came as a big surprise was the single girl thing. Yes I was the only girl in my batch. Till today it envies many, brings out disgust in some and brings out respect in many others.  I always had good friends in the opposite gender till today; Many of them who I know more than ten years or so. I never thought it would be a problem to be with them. But in Trichy it was a different story altogether, many of my batchmates itself looked at me like from an alien land. I was in a fix, I wasn’t able to judge at all. The ones who seemed good, seemed to be fake. The ones who seemed to be of more help, were far from my reach. Some people avoided me because they thought I would take in the wrong sense, some people I had to avoid, since they seemed to be upto no good.
One bizzare comment on ridiculing my passion happened in hostel, something that I can never forget in my life. Some people who believed that I took this to make sure I was in company of the guys. The most ridiculous doubt on my character. I made a mental note of it and decided that no one could make a mark in my life, like the people from school.
I was distracted way too much, though I topped my exams at that time also, I knew I was drifting off-track. Silly questions pondered me on the large. Why didn’t I have an elder brother to call me and take care? Why didn’t people worry about me and all such random stupid stuff. Should I have taken the other depts. And gone for being with girls?  At that point of time, I was questioning and contradicting myself.
But then the dawning day wasn’t far away either. The day we were given to assemble a diesel engine- Me, Sridhar, Sriram, Senthil, Basha, Thirumudi and Uday. A set of people I am highly indebted, for all their good will and assistance at laboratory sessions. All the four years, through ups and downs, they never ignored me nor overloaded me with work! Sometimes I really wonder what I would have done without them! Thank you again J
That day was awesomaticaly fantastic :P When the engine ran in the laboratory, I knew for sure that I was never been so happy in all my life. I wanted this, That day I knew I wanted this more than anything else.
It is amazing feeling, like a glow worm in dark, still you trust it to take you to your destination!
Now that it had been decided that I was going to be in there for four years, I wanted to ensure that as I returned back home after my degree, nobody should question my expertise or knowledge in my subject. That the quest was all about what I learnt more than what was being taught again caught my notice. Again thanks to my super scientist daddy and internet I got all the materials I needed at the right phases, I did the best of whatever I could. Ended up being on toppers list again.
The formula was working out, or so I believed! Till another laboratory class. Where I couldn’t recognize a single component of a Gearbox, I did so many sketches, got all the design formulae right, yet I realised the lack of practical approach and its disastrous effect was evident then! I looked like an idiot to myself.
You know I love those long walks I used to take with dad as a kid, till 8Th I guess. Infact today I miss those more than my mom’s cooked food. Well, that Is another story altogether :D
But nevertheless till today I never did miss home, of course whenever I was free, I used to run back and see people in there and Uthra priya, one lady who virtually stood by my side in the four long years.
Internal politics had been on at large at that phase, due to coincidential and strange misunderstandings, my batch mates were forced to believe that I had a lodged a complaint against them, owing to which they decided to boycott me. Those 10 long days was the worst part of my college life, with no smiles being returned to being seen in hatred. It would have lasted forever if not for a few people- Madhan, Senthil and Vivek- who coincidentally saw me crying alone in empty classroom after the classes were over- totally wrecked and in havoc, I had a break down that day. They didn’t give me much reassurance, they promised I would have the best of my college life, which I have today!
Focussing again on the major part, when I realised the importance of practicals, my faculties came into play big time and dad again. Being an ex-profy himself, he told me to do the IPT and IV.
2nd year Industrial visit to HAL was again a very good one.  Again I was the only girl with a batch of 56+ guys- 3 days- Bangalore- Mysore and Trichy was the plan. I organized it, maybe that is why they let me go. Our organizational skills were so fabulous that me, vignesh and Sridhar had lost 10,000 bucks sitting in the same place, yet got it. So good were our calculations! Anyways I Had a lot of people to convince for it actually- my parents, my faculties, my batchmates and lastly myself. For outsiders, it might have seemed that I never convinced myself, but I did a lot of thought study, actually, it was necessary.
And it paid off very well, from all the jeering and happy times during the travel to the photography session to the first live witnessing of the mechie gizmos, it did draw a lot of inspiration. That was the first place I visited all by myself, I puffed up in pride. Again since I organized it, there was not a single person whom I hadn’t spoken to in the batch, so everyone was good with me!
One big event happened that time. Yes, I fell in love, got immediate rejection, from a person who knew me for a long time. The only good part? I didn’t let it affect my studies, hence well save the sob story later.
Again mechanical is considered to be tough for girls. Yes, doing mensuration phases, it was difficult for me. Rest was fine enough. But I scarcely ate back those days, fell unconscious a lot of times in labs. Again my batchmates know all this story.
One big accident that left a scar on my hand was at hostel, surprisingly. I expected it to be at college :P I inserted the whole of my hand in the open end of an iron cot, during night due to imbalance. Blood was dripping like hell and It was one phase when I seriously wished I had someone. And I like a pro idiot stuffed cotton in it in haste, which got stuck in the wound. The nurse was so annoyed with my work and it was a painful task to pull out every bit. When I went for hospital to bandage it up, the way nurse poured tincture into the whole would apart from injecting me, apart from asking me half scared, if no one accompanied me? I felt sorry for myself.
That is just one half of the story, the second half? When a few people from my class knew it, they came over ensured I had my breakfast, gave me my tablets, had obviously bunked off their lectures to sit in canteen and make fun of me as I was sitting there crying in pain :P That day if not for them I would have never been able to feel fine! Thanks again!
And me like a goody good soul became the class rep for 2 years of my four years, ensuring all got 90% attendance, while truth was far from it. But then I learnt a lot about taking responsibilities and being politically right during these phases. That is to be favorite person among staffs and students you have to synchronize stuffs in the right way! Helped me a lot during the internship phase.
Again off the official work track, I made a lot of friends in my college days. That kallanai trip was one of the awesomatic experience in my college life! I still adore it..
Apart from this my birthday celebrations in Canteen the second year was nice! Actually my birthday celebrations got bigger and better with every year!
Much of the success that I got has to be attributed to the mechie seniors. Sakthi, Harini, Praveen, Preethi and Murali for starters- if you guys hadn’t taken me to NITT for the electrical symposium, then I probably would have never been to any college. Indirectly you guys instilled the feeling that we were no less than anyone. Of course that was yet another memorable day! Especially the quiz, we had no idea what we were doing, especially me :D
These were probably the best of college life, in the first two year phases.
As I opted out as a rep in the 3RD year, I knew very well what to do next- improve my profile. 1 Industrial visit, 1 internship, 2 Inplant trainings, 5 presentations and 10 + conferences, I seemed to have done something, looking back today!
The first IPT of mine was at Combat Vehicles Research and Development Establishment (CVRDE) at DRDO chennai. I was at dad’s work den in short with Riyaz and Venkatramana. One heck time we had going to places seeing the best of engineering at work. Again, a very good inspiration for me.
The second one was Integral Coach factory, Perambur, Chennai. It was a manufacturing unit 24 * 7 buzzing with work. How pieces of metal which we would scrap transforms into a beautiful locomotive was what it showed. I could get into details of what machines I saw and how utterly amazing they were, but it might bore you, so I’ll leave!
And the I completely begun a journey on my own!
Yes, I did go to a lot of top colleges for work sake. Started off with the ones that rejected my admission outright. Techofest with Vignesh and SS karthik for starters, in second year had gone with them. But during the third I went on my own, visiting stalls seeing people in groups wondering why I was alone, peer pressure to some extent.
I decided that if I didn’t have any work to do, I shouldn’t go anywhere.
The meticulous planning gave rise to the biggest achievement in my four year span. The NITT Concept Car Design Challenge! One solid month It took me to draft the whole concept into two sets of presentations- ne for car assistance and safety. The second one RUV vehicle! The judges were from Mahindra group, seemed interested in my off road Rural utility vehicle concept. I happily completed my ppt and sat along with Murali one of my friends at NITT. When 3rd and 2nd was announced I was pretty sure I had lost it again! But there came the jolt from the blue, I won the first prize.  One it was a core competition and lets face it was tough- 2000 + designs had been rejected at prelims stage! But I did it yay! Thankfully my friend had congratulated me and I was on my own to trichy.
That 1 and half hour journey back to college was very different, since I wanted to like say to everyone, share my happiness and all, but then I was alone that time. Like an idiot, I was smiling again in thoughts.
That had greatly instilled the faith that I could do a lot more. Ended up doing a presentation at CEG, the reputed AU with my junior Prasanna, the biggest mistake of my life. You know ‘research’ and ‘studies’ are different. I presented a fab idea to professors, ended up being asked randomly ridiculous questions on 2nd semester theory. A waste of time! As I ended up third in there, I knew very well that PG in here wasn’t going to work out any time. The term ‘research’ was a living dead concept.
One more opportunity was given by my faculties, to represent my college at the French auto firm Valeo, in Chennai. I went with my friend Uday. Okay lets admit it, I always thought IT firms were AC cooled fancy types, again I was proved wrong at Valeo. A presentation on emissions, I did not end up winning, since frankly I did not work hard, a wee bit of problems in relationships and overloaded with work at that phase. Nevertheless made it to the top ten in India, for that conference. Got a trophy, which I value with all my life.
I became restless when I didn’t have work, I was achieving but till today something seems to be staggering, I don’t know what.
Okay, again in the last phase of my college life, I was a ruckus frankly. A thing was troubling me a lot, the grades hadn’t tumbled nor did the presentations stop. But I had been a very unhappy person. Three people actually made sure I was perfect- Uthra, Sathyanarayanan and Ashfaq. Uthra had focused on pulling me out of the past, Ashfaq was making me do the best at present, Sathya was helping about the future.
One person who surely came back with a bang in this phase was Ashfaq, with the internship at Renault-Nissan. Something that was absolutely my dream! And a very very worthwhile experience. Working with someone who is absolutely pro at his work is always a pleasure! I learnt a lot and simultaneously I pulled myself from everything and started focusing on the bigger part of life!
Yet again, my plans after this are crystal clear, but
I would love to tell you only after I make it absolutely real!
Thanking Again to all you lovely people out there, who walked in my life making a great difference and greater thanks to those who walked out of it and made it even more fabulous!
One thing is for sure, no matter where I go what I do, whatever mood I am in, I would definetly dress up and fight for my dreams.
For me it is always about the passion, and I would never give that up, Never-Ever!
And Come what may I would surely end up in a good firm at the start and in the end- BMW R&D. That is where I want to be putting up my best friend’s gift- a key chain in my gift!
Very nostalgic as I end up this note, which actually took me continuous 2.5 hours to type :P
Lastly all of us have dreams, some want to soar high in the sky, some long for love etc etc,
I wanted to be an engineer and I got it!
Loads of Love,
Finally An Engineer, Proud to be One!

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That it will never come again is what makes life more and more Interesting… It takes real good time to understand me.. And sometimes, Even people who understand me fail to get whatever I mean… For people who don’t know about me, I’m A fun-loving, friendly, Optimistic, Jovial, Out-going girl… Sometimes shy when the whole crowd is new…. But I get along with people very soon….. I have a lot of friends who consider me an important part of their life… I cheer up people very easily when they are sad…. I like Indian culture.. I Like analyzing characters… Emotions and Science are what I consider awesome Books are My best buddies...... i Read a hell lot of them...... Some of my friends think I can be a good listener… I can listen patiently… But even I can talk a lot… Its hard to get under my skin.. I always find out what people are upto very easily... I don intend to But it doesnot get out of my view I’m not very caring, Very friendly and all but I’m very naughty… My mood swings a lot… And finally, what matters is What U Know About Me And Not What U Read Over Here :)


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